This afternoon I had a (very rare) nap. During that nap I had a lucid dream (most of which I no longer remember). As I was waking up, I was thinking about my dream and thought that it would be a great idea to write a list about dreams for the site. So, here are the top 10 amazing facts about dreams.
10. Blind People Dream
People who become blind after birth can see images in their dreams. People who are born blind do not see any images, but have dreams equally vivid involving their other senses of sound, smell, touch and emotion. It is hard for a seeing person to imagine, but the body’s need for sleep is so strong that it is able to handle virtually all physical situations to make it happen.
9. You Forget 90% of your Dreams
Within 5 minutes of waking, half of your dream if forgotten. Within 10, 90% is gone. The famous poet, Samuel Taylor Coleridge, woke one morning having had a fantastic dream (likely opium induced) – he put pen to paper and began to describe his “vision in a dream” in what has become one of English’s most famous poems: Kubla Khan. Part way through (54 lines in fact) he was interrupted by a “Person from Porlock“. Coleridge returned to his poem but could not remember the rest of his dream. The poem was never completed.
In Xanadu did Kubla Khan
A stately pleasure-dome decree:
Where Alph, the sacred river, ran
Through caverns measureless to man
Down to a sunless sea.
[...]
Curiously, Robert Louis Stevenson came up with the story of Doctor Jeckyll and Mr. Hyde whilst he was dreaming. Wikipedia has more on that here. Mary Shelley’s Frankenstein was also the brainchild of a dream.
8. Everybody Dreams
Every human being dreams (except in cases of extreme psychological disorder) but men and women have different dreams and different physical reactions. Men tend to dream more about other men, while women tend to dream equally about men and women. In addition, both men and women experience sexually related physical reactions to their dreams regardless of whether the dream is sexual in nature; males experience erections and females experience increased vaginal blood flow.
7. Dreams Prevent Psychosis
In a recent sleep study, students who were awakened at the beginning of each dream, but still allowed their 8 hours of sleep, all experienced difficulty in concentration, irritability, hallucinations, and signs of psychosis after only 3 days. When finally allowed their REM sleep the student’s brains made up for lost time by greatly increasing the percentage of sleep spent in the REM stage. [Source]
6. We Only Dream of What We Know
Our dreams are frequently full of strangers who play out certain parts – did you know that your mind is not inventing those faces – they are real faces of real people that you have seen during your life but may not know or remember? The evil killer in your latest dream may be the guy who pumped petrol in to your Dad’s car when you were just a little kid. We have all seen hundreds of thousands of faces through our lives, so we have an endless supply of characters for our brain to utilize during our dreams.
5. Not Everyone Dreams in Color
A full 12% of sighted people dream exclusively in black and white. The remaining number dream in full color. People also tend to have common themes in dreams, which are situations relating to school, being chased, running slowly/in place, sexual experiences, falling, arriving too late, a person now alive being dead, teeth falling out, flying, failing an examination, or a car accident. It is unknown whether the impact of a dream relating to violence or death is more emotionally charged for a person who dreams in color than one who dreams in black and white. [Source]
4. Dreams are not about what they are about
If you dream about some particular subject it is not often that the dream is about that. Dreams speak in a deeply symbolic language. The unconscious mind tries to compare your dream to something else, which is similar. Its like writing a poem and saying that a group of ants were like machines that never stop. But you would never compare something to itself, for example: “That beautiful sunset was like a beautiful sunset”. So whatever symbol your dream picks on it is most unlikely to be a symbol for itself.
3. Quitters have more vivid dreams
People who have smoked cigarettes for a long time who stop, have reported much more vivid dreams than they would normally experience. Additionally, according to the Journal of Abnormal Psychology: “Among 293 smokers abstinent for between 1 and 4 weeks, 33% reported having at least 1 dream about smoking. In most dreams, subjects caught themselves smoking and felt strong negative emotions, such as panic and guilt. Dreams about smoking were the result of tobacco withdrawal, as 97% of subjects did not have them while smoking, and their occurrence was significantly related to the duration of abstinence. They were rated as more vivid than the usual dreams and were as common as most major tobacco withdrawal symptoms.” [Source]
2. External Stimuli Invade our Dreams
This is called Dream Incorporation and it is the experience that most of us have had where a sound from reality is heard in our dream and incorporated in some way. A similar (though less external) example would be when you are physically thirsty and your mind incorporates that feeling in to your dream. My own experience of this includes repeatedly drinking a large glass of water in the dream which satisfies me, only to find the thirst returning shortly after – this thirst… drink… thirst… loop often recurs until I wake up and have a real drink. The famous painting above (Dream Caused by the Flight of a Bee around a Pomegranate a Second Before Awakening) by Salvador Dali, depicts this concept.
1. You are paralyzed while you sleep
Believe it or not, your body is virtually paralyzed during your sleep – most likely to prevent your body from acting out aspects of your dreams. According to the Wikipedia article on dreaming, “Glands begin to secrete a hormone that helps induce sleep and neurons send signals to the spinal cord which cause the body to relax and later become essentially paralyzed.”
Bonus: Extra Facts
1. When you are snoring, you are not dreaming.
2. Toddlers do not dream about themselves until around the age of 3. From the same age, children typically have many more nightmares than adults do until age 7 or 8.
3. If you are awakened out of REM (Rapid Eye Movement) sleep, you are more likely to remember your dream in a more vivid way than you would if you woke from a full night sleep.
Sunday, August 30, 2009
Wednesday, August 26, 2009
The Hospital Window
A great note for all to read, it will take just 37 seconds to read this and change your thinking
Two men, both seriously ill, occupied the same hospital room. One man was allowed to sit up in his bed for an hour each afternoon to help drain the fluid from his lungs. His bed was next to the room's only window. The other man had to spend all his time flat on his back. The men talked for hours on end. They spoke of their wives and families, their homes, their jobs, their involvement in the military service, where they had been on vacation.
Every afternoon when the man in the bed by the window could sit up, he would pass the time by describing to his roommate all the things he could see outside the window.
The man in the other bed began to live for those one hour periods where his world would be broadened and enlivened by all the activity and color of the world outside.
The window overlooked a park with a lovely lake. Ducks and swans played on the water while children sailed their model boats. Young lovers walked arm in arm amidst flowers of every color and a fine view of the city skyline could be seen in the distance.
As the man by the window described all this in exquisite detail, the man on the other side of the room would close his eyes and imagine the picturesque scene.
One warm afternoon the man by the window described a parade passing by.
Although the other man couldn't hear the band - he could see it. In his mind's eye as the gentleman by the window portrayed it with descriptive words.
Days and weeks passed.
One morning, the day nurse arrived to bring water for their baths only to find the lifeless body of the man by the window, who had died peacefully in his sleep. She was saddened and called the hospital attendants to take the body away.
As soon as it seemed appropriate, the other man asked if he could be moved next to the
window. The nurse was happy to make the switch, and after making
sure he was comfortable, she left him alone.
Slowly, painfully, he propped himself up on one elbow to take his
first look at the real world outside.
He strained to slowly turn to look out the window beside the bed.
It faced a blank wall. The man asked the nurse what could have
compelled his deceased roommate who had described such wonderful
things outside this window
The nurse responded that the man was blind and could not even see
the wall.
She said, "Perhaps he just wanted to encourage you."
Epilogue:
There is tremendous happiness in making others happy, despite our
own situations.
Shared grief is half the sorrow, but happiness when shared, is
doubled.
If you want to feel rich, just count all the things you have that
money can't buy.
"Today is a gift, that's why it is called the present."
Two men, both seriously ill, occupied the same hospital room. One man was allowed to sit up in his bed for an hour each afternoon to help drain the fluid from his lungs. His bed was next to the room's only window. The other man had to spend all his time flat on his back. The men talked for hours on end. They spoke of their wives and families, their homes, their jobs, their involvement in the military service, where they had been on vacation.
Every afternoon when the man in the bed by the window could sit up, he would pass the time by describing to his roommate all the things he could see outside the window.
The man in the other bed began to live for those one hour periods where his world would be broadened and enlivened by all the activity and color of the world outside.
The window overlooked a park with a lovely lake. Ducks and swans played on the water while children sailed their model boats. Young lovers walked arm in arm amidst flowers of every color and a fine view of the city skyline could be seen in the distance.
As the man by the window described all this in exquisite detail, the man on the other side of the room would close his eyes and imagine the picturesque scene.
One warm afternoon the man by the window described a parade passing by.
Although the other man couldn't hear the band - he could see it. In his mind's eye as the gentleman by the window portrayed it with descriptive words.
Days and weeks passed.
One morning, the day nurse arrived to bring water for their baths only to find the lifeless body of the man by the window, who had died peacefully in his sleep. She was saddened and called the hospital attendants to take the body away.
As soon as it seemed appropriate, the other man asked if he could be moved next to the
window. The nurse was happy to make the switch, and after making
sure he was comfortable, she left him alone.
Slowly, painfully, he propped himself up on one elbow to take his
first look at the real world outside.
He strained to slowly turn to look out the window beside the bed.
It faced a blank wall. The man asked the nurse what could have
compelled his deceased roommate who had described such wonderful
things outside this window
The nurse responded that the man was blind and could not even see
the wall.
She said, "Perhaps he just wanted to encourage you."
Epilogue:
There is tremendous happiness in making others happy, despite our
own situations.
Shared grief is half the sorrow, but happiness when shared, is
doubled.
If you want to feel rich, just count all the things you have that
money can't buy.
"Today is a gift, that's why it is called the present."
Monday, August 17, 2009
the story about Ugly
Everyone in the apartment complex I lived in knew who Ugly was. Ugly was the resident tomcat.
Ugly loved three things in this world: fighting, eating garbage, and shall we say, love. The combination of these things combined with a life spent outside had their effect on Ugly.
To start with, he had only one eye, and where the other should have been was a gaping hole. He was also missing his ear on the same side, his left foot has appeared to have been badly broken at one time, and had healed at an unnatural angle, making him look like he was always turning the corner. His tail has long since been lost, leaving only the smallest stub, which he would constantly jerk and twitch. Ugly would have been a dark gray tabby striped-type, except for the sores covering his head, neck, even his shoulders with thick, yellowing scabs.
Every time someone saw Ugly there was the same reaction. "That's one UGLY cat!!"
All the children were warned not to touch him, the adults threw rocks at him, hosed him down, squirted him when he tried to come in their homes, or shut his paws in the door when he would not leave.
Ugly always had the same reaction. If you turned the hose on him, he would stand there, getting soaked until you gave up and quit. If you threw things at him, he would curl his lanky body around feet in forgiveness. Whenever he spied children, he would come running meowing frantically and bump his head against their hands, begging for their love. If you ever picked him up he would immediately begin suckling on your shirt, earrings, whatever he could find.
One day Ugly shared his love with the neighbors huskies. They did not respond kindly, and Ugly was badly mauled. From my apartment I could hear his screams, and I tried to rush to his aid. By the time I got to where he was laying, it was apparent Ugly's sad life was almost at an end.
Ugly lay in a wet circle, his back legs and lower back twisted grossly out of shape, a gaping tear in the white strip of fur that ran down his front. As I picked him up and tried to carry him home I could hear him wheezing and gasping, and could feel him struggling. I must be hurting him terribly I thought.
Then I felt a familiar tugging, sucking sensation on my ear - Ugly, in so much pain, suffering and obviously dying was trying to suckle my ear. I pulled him closer to me, and he bumped the palm of my hand with his head, then he turned his one golden eye towards me, and I could hear the distinct sound of purring. Even in the greatest pain, that ugly battled-scarred cat was asking only for a little affection, perhaps some compassion.
At that moment I thought Ugly was the most beautiful, loving creature I had ever seen. Never once did he try to bite or scratch me, or even try to get away from me, or struggle in any way. Ugly just looked up at me completely trusting in me to relieve his pain.
Ugly died in my arms before I could get inside, but I sat and held him for a long time afterwards, thinking about how one scarred, deformed little stray could so alter my opinion about what it means to have true pureness of spirit, to love so totally and truly. Ugly taught me more about giving and compassion than a thousand books, lectures, or talk show specials ever could, and for that I will always be thankful. He had been scarred on the outside, but I was scarred on the inside, and it was time for me to move on and learn to love truly and deeply. To give my total to those I cared for.
Many people want to be richer, more successful, well liked, beautiful, but for me, I will always try to be Ugly.
Ugly loved three things in this world: fighting, eating garbage, and shall we say, love. The combination of these things combined with a life spent outside had their effect on Ugly.
To start with, he had only one eye, and where the other should have been was a gaping hole. He was also missing his ear on the same side, his left foot has appeared to have been badly broken at one time, and had healed at an unnatural angle, making him look like he was always turning the corner. His tail has long since been lost, leaving only the smallest stub, which he would constantly jerk and twitch. Ugly would have been a dark gray tabby striped-type, except for the sores covering his head, neck, even his shoulders with thick, yellowing scabs.
Every time someone saw Ugly there was the same reaction. "That's one UGLY cat!!"
All the children were warned not to touch him, the adults threw rocks at him, hosed him down, squirted him when he tried to come in their homes, or shut his paws in the door when he would not leave.
Ugly always had the same reaction. If you turned the hose on him, he would stand there, getting soaked until you gave up and quit. If you threw things at him, he would curl his lanky body around feet in forgiveness. Whenever he spied children, he would come running meowing frantically and bump his head against their hands, begging for their love. If you ever picked him up he would immediately begin suckling on your shirt, earrings, whatever he could find.
One day Ugly shared his love with the neighbors huskies. They did not respond kindly, and Ugly was badly mauled. From my apartment I could hear his screams, and I tried to rush to his aid. By the time I got to where he was laying, it was apparent Ugly's sad life was almost at an end.
Ugly lay in a wet circle, his back legs and lower back twisted grossly out of shape, a gaping tear in the white strip of fur that ran down his front. As I picked him up and tried to carry him home I could hear him wheezing and gasping, and could feel him struggling. I must be hurting him terribly I thought.
Then I felt a familiar tugging, sucking sensation on my ear - Ugly, in so much pain, suffering and obviously dying was trying to suckle my ear. I pulled him closer to me, and he bumped the palm of my hand with his head, then he turned his one golden eye towards me, and I could hear the distinct sound of purring. Even in the greatest pain, that ugly battled-scarred cat was asking only for a little affection, perhaps some compassion.
At that moment I thought Ugly was the most beautiful, loving creature I had ever seen. Never once did he try to bite or scratch me, or even try to get away from me, or struggle in any way. Ugly just looked up at me completely trusting in me to relieve his pain.
Ugly died in my arms before I could get inside, but I sat and held him for a long time afterwards, thinking about how one scarred, deformed little stray could so alter my opinion about what it means to have true pureness of spirit, to love so totally and truly. Ugly taught me more about giving and compassion than a thousand books, lectures, or talk show specials ever could, and for that I will always be thankful. He had been scarred on the outside, but I was scarred on the inside, and it was time for me to move on and learn to love truly and deeply. To give my total to those I cared for.
Many people want to be richer, more successful, well liked, beautiful, but for me, I will always try to be Ugly.
Friday, August 14, 2009
Why Men Want Sex and Women Want Love
It's been a fucking long time since I last posted something, so here's an article, food for thought! ->
Men are frustrated with women because they never want sex.
Women are frustrated with men because they always want sex.
Women blame men they don't know how to love.
Men blame women that they only talk about love but don't want to make it.
Whether you are a man or a woman, reading this article can change your life - finally, you will be able to get rid of your frustrations about the opposite gender.
The reason humans want sex is due to the hormone testosterone, which is predominantly male hormone. A normal male's body produces 20 times more of this hormone than a female's.
In other words, a male feels the same way after one day without sex as a female after 20 days without sex. A male that has not had sex in 20 days feels the same way as a female after more than a year without sex.
Knowing this simple difference, you can already understand the pain of the opposite gender. It's NOT their fault: they are made this way! It's in our genes! This is the reason why men are men and women are women.
Men and women are DIFFERENT.
Not better or worse, just different.
A man can father a child every time he has sex, and a woman can only mother a child every two years or so. This means, a woman HAS TO be picky about who she allows to have sex with her.
For generations women were paying too high a price for making a wrong choice. Women that have chosen men with bad genes had a weaker offspring and their children struggled to survive. Women that have chosen men with good genes had a stronger offspring and their children survived disproportionally. Those children were carrying their picky mother's genes and this is why those female genes were passed to us.
On the other hand, men never had adverse consequences of making a wrong choice. The more children they produced, the higher was their chance to pass their genes to future generations, as some of them would certainly survive. While men were determined to seek better genes too, they had to grab all chances to procreate coming their way to ensure their genes would be passed forward. The men that ONLY stuck with one woman (even a high quality woman) were losing genetically to the men that used all of their opportunities and had many more children that survived. Those children were carrying their father's promiscuous genes, and this is why those male genes were passed to us.
By Nature men are made to seek as much sex as they can get, so they can spread their seed wider.
By Nature women are made to seek as many admirers as they can get, so they can make a better choice and get the best seed.
Men seek quantity - women seek quality.
This is why men seek sex and women seek love.
Love is the proof that a woman needs to have some assurance that the man will stick around and help her with the upbringing of the offspring. For a woman, sex is the culmination of her emotional commitment to a man.
For a man, sex is a physical act that eases the testosterone pressure he experiences constantly. Only after this tension has gone, can a man feel love towards a woman. This is why it often happens that men disappear after they got what they wanted: it wasn't love; it was the testosterone pressure. Sex for men is the reality check of their passion.
This is why having sex early in the relationship is hazardous for women: the man has not had the time to develop any romantic feelings for her. He needs time to develop those feelings, and the only way to do it is through keeping the sexual tension going for as long as practicable. Sex must be attainable, nearly possible - but not quite. When the sexual tension is at its peak, its release is mind-blowing - and once is never enough, which lays a proper foundation for a future relationship - and love.
Men fall in love through sex; women fall in sex through love.
All of this happens on the unconscious level - we do NOT realize what's going on.
But the reason why you are here today and alive is because each and every of your ancestors, men and women, acted true to their instincts and managed to attract at least one sexual partner and produce an offspring.
So, there is no need to be bitter about men wanting sex and women wanting love. Those two are the necessary pieces of the puzzle called Survival Of The Species.
And you'll be better off understanding what the other gender is going through and giving them exactly what they want: a mind-blowing sex or exhilarating love.
Go get 'em! :-)
Men are frustrated with women because they never want sex.
Women are frustrated with men because they always want sex.
Women blame men they don't know how to love.
Men blame women that they only talk about love but don't want to make it.
Whether you are a man or a woman, reading this article can change your life - finally, you will be able to get rid of your frustrations about the opposite gender.
The reason humans want sex is due to the hormone testosterone, which is predominantly male hormone. A normal male's body produces 20 times more of this hormone than a female's.
In other words, a male feels the same way after one day without sex as a female after 20 days without sex. A male that has not had sex in 20 days feels the same way as a female after more than a year without sex.
Knowing this simple difference, you can already understand the pain of the opposite gender. It's NOT their fault: they are made this way! It's in our genes! This is the reason why men are men and women are women.
Men and women are DIFFERENT.
Not better or worse, just different.
A man can father a child every time he has sex, and a woman can only mother a child every two years or so. This means, a woman HAS TO be picky about who she allows to have sex with her.
For generations women were paying too high a price for making a wrong choice. Women that have chosen men with bad genes had a weaker offspring and their children struggled to survive. Women that have chosen men with good genes had a stronger offspring and their children survived disproportionally. Those children were carrying their picky mother's genes and this is why those female genes were passed to us.
On the other hand, men never had adverse consequences of making a wrong choice. The more children they produced, the higher was their chance to pass their genes to future generations, as some of them would certainly survive. While men were determined to seek better genes too, they had to grab all chances to procreate coming their way to ensure their genes would be passed forward. The men that ONLY stuck with one woman (even a high quality woman) were losing genetically to the men that used all of their opportunities and had many more children that survived. Those children were carrying their father's promiscuous genes, and this is why those male genes were passed to us.
By Nature men are made to seek as much sex as they can get, so they can spread their seed wider.
By Nature women are made to seek as many admirers as they can get, so they can make a better choice and get the best seed.
Men seek quantity - women seek quality.
This is why men seek sex and women seek love.
Love is the proof that a woman needs to have some assurance that the man will stick around and help her with the upbringing of the offspring. For a woman, sex is the culmination of her emotional commitment to a man.
For a man, sex is a physical act that eases the testosterone pressure he experiences constantly. Only after this tension has gone, can a man feel love towards a woman. This is why it often happens that men disappear after they got what they wanted: it wasn't love; it was the testosterone pressure. Sex for men is the reality check of their passion.
This is why having sex early in the relationship is hazardous for women: the man has not had the time to develop any romantic feelings for her. He needs time to develop those feelings, and the only way to do it is through keeping the sexual tension going for as long as practicable. Sex must be attainable, nearly possible - but not quite. When the sexual tension is at its peak, its release is mind-blowing - and once is never enough, which lays a proper foundation for a future relationship - and love.
Men fall in love through sex; women fall in sex through love.
All of this happens on the unconscious level - we do NOT realize what's going on.
But the reason why you are here today and alive is because each and every of your ancestors, men and women, acted true to their instincts and managed to attract at least one sexual partner and produce an offspring.
So, there is no need to be bitter about men wanting sex and women wanting love. Those two are the necessary pieces of the puzzle called Survival Of The Species.
And you'll be better off understanding what the other gender is going through and giving them exactly what they want: a mind-blowing sex or exhilarating love.
Go get 'em! :-)
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